By Sharon Akose
When Velma Ondiso landed a well-paying job that required frequent travel and exposure, she believed it would uplift her family and ease the pressure on her husband. Instead, the new opportunity has become the source of endless fights at home.
Her husband now views her career with suspicion. Each time Velma leaves for work trips, he accuses her of using the job as an excuse to cheat, or of acting too independent. What was meant to be a blessing has turned into a battle of mistrust and insecurity.
Family counselors say Velma’s story mirrors a growing trend in Kenyan homes. As more women gain jobs that involve travel, networking, and higher pay, some men feel threatened rather than supported. For many, the traditional role of breadwinner still defines their identity.
“In our culture, a man’s pride is tied to his ability to provide,” explains marriage counselor Anne Achieng. “When a wife begins to earn more or spends more time outside the home for work, some men interpret this as loss of authority or assume unfaithfulness, even without proof.”
But with today’s tough economic climate, experts insist that teamwork is no longer optional.
Two incomes are often necessary to sustain a household. Marriage, they argue, should be about partnership rather than competition. “Instead of suspicion, couples need to build trust and open communication,” adds Achieng. “Otherwise, families will keep breaking under unnecessary pressure.”
For Velma, her career has become a double-edged sword empowering her financially, but straining her marriage.
And as more women embrace jobs that demand exposure, the bigger question remains: will men learn to support and trust their wives, or will insecurity continue to tear homes apart?